You’ve been caught cheating and now the most pressing thing on your mind is how to go about saving your marriage. It might seem like a shot in the dark at the moment but sometimes that one shot is all you need to hit the bulls-eye head on. Yes, there is hope for your marriage after cheating. The downside to that is that you’re really going to have to put a lot of effort into making things right.
What can you do to make your chances for success even better?
1) Give your spouse a little time to come to terms with everything. You do not need an answer right this very minute. While you don’t want to go on in limbo indefinitely it’s a good idea to be prepared to give the love of your life a little bit of time to wrap his or her brain around what you have done and what it might mean to the health and longevity of your marriage.
2) Avoid all appearances of evil. For a while you’re going to have to walk a very fine line. Any behaviors or activities that made cheating possible in the past are now going to be very suspect. Expect to spend a lot more time with your spouse than in the past and to be held accountable for where you are (and with whom) when you are not with your spouse. It’s understandable that trust has been breached and the leash might be a little tighter for some time.
3) Apologize to your spouse. It might not seem like a big deal to you but to the person you’ve wronged it means everything. It might not even be accepted but you need to put it out there in order to prove your sincerity. In your apology it is important that you accept responsibility, assign no blame, and ask for forgiveness. If you don’t do these things the apology will not seem to be sincere and is not likely to be well accepted.
4) Explain what will be different this time around. When you’re trying to convince the one you cheated on to give you another chance you need to have a mental list of all the things you’ll do differently this time around prepared. This proves your sincerity and that you’ve put a lot of thought into what needs to change to make things better. It also lets your spouse know that you’re taking this seriously and thinking about the future rather than just hoping they’ll do all the heavy lifting for making the relationship work a second time.
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