Has your boyfriend cheated on you? Did you discover him cheating a while back and still don’t know what to do? Do you spend every day wondering if he’s cheating on you again? Are you struggling to decide if he deserves another chance? Unfortunately this heartbreaking situation is all too common. Fortunately, men who cheat tend to follow certain predictable behavior patterns. He cheated on you and this can’t be changed, but does he deserve another chance?
Why did he stray?
Cheaters tend to blame everybody else for their infidelity. You need to know that it is not your fault he cheated. With this in mind, why did he stray? Sometimes men get off on the idea that two women want them. He might be fantasizing about the two of you meeting and having a cat fight. He might be completely arrogant and think it’s his right to be with lots of women at once. Maybe your relationship has stagnated a bit, however if this is the case then both parties are to blame, not just you.
Whatever his reason is, try to discover it. If he cheated on you because he thinks he has the right to then you’ll need to question whether you want to be with this kind of man and whether you can cope with future heartbreak when he does it again. Can you turn a blind eye? Is he worth it? You must answer these questions yourself.
It is a sad fact that most cheaters will cheat again, and again, and again. If he has such a basic lack of respect for you and the life that you have together that he continues to cheat after being caught, again you need to question whether you can live like this. If monogamy isn’t vitally important to you then perhaps you can continue the relationship, coming to an agreement about seeing other people. If not, there are plenty of monogamous men out there, move on.
If he cheated to get your attention and to ‘test’ whether or not you would care, then talk things through with him. Maybe you haven’t been giving the relationship as much of your time as you should have done, perhaps you’ve been busy at work or worried about family. In this case you would be wise to give him another chance.
He cheated. This cannot be changed. You need to re-evaluate your life with this man and decide on the best way forward. Also, look at yourself. Have previous partners cheated on you? Is the pattern here your own rather than his?
If you decide to give him another chance then you must work through the deception now and move on. You both know he cheated. Don’t bring it up time and time again, this will destroy any hope that the two of you may have a future life together. If you find yourself questioning his every move, checking his phone and going through his pockets while he’s in the shower, perhaps it would be better to end it and move on. At the end of the day you must have trust. Love cannot flourish without it.
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